


See Me After Class

by BurnedStars777



Category: Star Wars, Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - College/University, Ben Solo Needs A Hug, Ben Solo is a Mess, Classroom Sex, F/M, Fluff and Smut, Haiku, Love Poems, Prose Poem, Teacher-Student Relationship, Virgin Rey (Star Wars)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-02
Updated: 2019-03-06
Packaged: 2019-11-07 20:55:38
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 14,838
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17967899
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BurnedStars777/pseuds/BurnedStars777
Summary: See me after class.Rey’s stomach immediately dropped. It was a note no student wanted to see from a teacher. Except it wasn’t from her teacher. It was from the TA.And he had probably figured out the poem she submitted was about him and his big ears.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This is just a fun, little, AU, trash story that I’ve wanted to write just for shits and giggles. Hope you enjoy! The length of this story will honestly depend on the response. I’m planning for just a few chapters, but it could potentially be more. I personally like the Star Wars universe too much to get super wrapped up in AU stories, (currently writing my next Star Wars fic) but I wanted to give this a try. Let me know what you think!

            Rey hated writing.

Her penmanship was absolute chicken scratch for one thing; you could barely figure out what she was trying to say after the fourth read-through.

But she also just _hated_ it. She was a logical person, and logical people couldn’t be bothered writing about how they _felt_ or what was _symbolic_ about the cup of coffee they drank that morning.

She had to take this class though. It was the last creative requirement she needed to finish her degree, and then she would be out of here. Finn had already graduated in the spring with the rest of her class, while she was left to toil this summer. Writing poems. Hand cramps and all.

The class was basically empty. There were only six students total, counting her. The professor was nice enough, but then again she had always heard good things about Skywalker. She knew he could tell his class wasn’t for her, but he was always so patient, even when she had no idea what she was doing. When she found herself struggling to put something on paper, he would often tell her to pull from a memory, or even something she saw in the room. Despite the fact she thought the class was a waste of time; she found she really wanted to please him.

While Professor Skywalker was a delight, his Teacher’s Assistant was…something else.

If there was anyone who looked like they didn’t want to be there more than her, it was Ben Solo. He came to class every morning and just sat in a corner with a scowl on his face. He looked older, quite a bit older than her. Definitely not fresh out of undergrad. She wondered what he was doing here.

She heard two students talking to each other before class one day. Their comments led Rey to believe this guy and Skywalker were related somehow. Huh. So nepotism had landed him this job then. Still didn’t explain why he was such a grouch.

She realized she was staring at Solo when he made eye contact with her, and she ducked her head in embarrassment.

“I’d like you to take the rest of the class period to write a prose poem about a topic that gives you mixed feelings,” Professor Skywalker said. “Please turn them in at the end of class. They’ll be counted for a quiz grade.”

Rey could feel sweat forming at the back of her neck. Up until now, they had only been doing writing exercises. Which was no problem. She could be terrible as long as it didn’t impact her grade. This was a whole other can of worms. She needed to pass this class to get her degree, which meant she actually had to write something good for once.

“Please begin.”

Rey hunched over her paper, poised to write, but her mind went completely blank. She panicked. She only had twenty minutes to write a poem, and she had no idea where to start. What gave her mixed feelings? Practically nothing. It was always extremes with her. She glanced at the clock and discovered she had already wasted five minutes.

_Think Rey, think. What tips did Skywalker give you?_

A memory? She couldn’t think of any that gave her mixed feelings. Her life was so mundane and so planned and so simple.

She would have to find something in the room then.

She glanced around, trying not to reveal how stressed she was. The classroom itself was rather dull looking. Thin carpet flooring and cream walls and shoddy desks. That was about it. Her eyes raked over the students in front of her. Maybe she could write something about her classmates. Her nose scrunched up in distaste at the thought. She didn’t feel mixed about them. They all were outspoken, pretentious, artsy kids who would cover their pursed lips with their hands when she’d had to read her past work out loud. If she wrote about them the content would be entirely negative.

Rey’s eyes eventually fell on Ben Solo again. He sat at his own desk in the back corner of the room. He had a stack of papers in front of him, but he wasn’t even looking at them. His eyes stared down at the floor; he appeared to be deep in thought. The scowl on his face was gone, replaced with a peaceful sort of expression. His long raven hair was tucked behind one large ear, and Rey realized she had her subject in front of her.

Don’t judge her. She was short on time after all.

Rey scrambled to write down her thoughts, thankful that the format was prose. Out of all the poetry they had studied so far, she enjoyed this the most. She didn’t have to worry about rhyming or putting things into stanzas. She could just word vomit onto the page, and she would be golden.

She was just finishing up her last line when Skywalker called, “Time.”

As the students came to the front-some of them wearing the snobbiest of expressions on their faces-Rey cast a quick glance at Ben. The thoughtful look on his face was gone, and he was brooding again.

Rey went to hand her paper to Professor Skywalker, but the older man shook his head. “You can hand that in to Ben, Rey. He’ll be the one grading this first assignment.”

Her entire face turned beet red, and her mouth opened in shock. She glanced down at her paper and then back up at Skywalker, mortified.

“C-could I have time to make some edits?” she asked, not even caring when one of the other students snorted behind her.

Skywalker smiled. “Don’t be nervous. I’m sure whatever you have is exceptional.”

Rey blinked several times, the blood pounding in her ears as she robotically paced to Ben’s desk. He regarded her curiously, and she could venture why. She was sure the sweat on her forehead was clearly visible.

She handed him the paper silently, jerking her hand back a bit when their fingers brushed. He seemed to be studying her, but she didn’t know what he was thinking. He was unreadable.

“Thank you,” he said, and she nodded rigidly before practically sprinting out of the classroom.

She felt sick to her stomach that night. She couldn’t even bring herself to answer any of Finn’s texts. Usually she loved to spend hours talking to Finn, updating each other about their lives after his graduation. She knew he had been spending a lot of time with an older coworker from his new job, a man named Poe. Rey didn’t know much about Poe, but she knew Finn admired him, and the two had become fast friends.

But she couldn’t think about Finn’s happiness now. All she could think about was Ben Solo reading over her poem. She desperately tried to remember word for word what she had written, but it was all a jumbled mess in her mind. She could only recall specific words and phrases.

_Thoughtful gaze…red lips…quiet scowl…_

“Ugh!” she growled, burying her face in her hands. If only she could remember the details!

Two days later, when class was held again, Rey made sure to sit in the very back of the room. Her heart kept pounding in her chest, over and over again. It was a similar feeling as to when she was about to get up and speak in front of the class. Utterly nauseating.

Professor Skywalker didn’t address the quiz right away. They spent the day discussing meter, and Rey of course made a fool of herself when she couldn’t identify the differences between trochaic and iambic.

When she guessed incorrectly for the third time, she slumped in defeat, her face bright red. She felt like someone was watching her, so she glared around the classroom accusingly, searching for the culprit. Eventually she met Ben’s eyes, but unlike the class before, he was the one to hastily look away. Odd.

As the class period dragged on, Rey began to calm down. There was no way he could have really known she had written about him, right? Right. The topic was vague enough that it could have been about anyone really. She was making a big deal over nothing.

So she didn’t even flinch when Ben started handing back the poems. He came to her last, seeing as she was seated in the back. He placed her poem on her desk, and then abruptly turned around and walked to the front of the classroom.

Rey didn’t look at her paper at first. She was too busy rolling her eyes at her other classmates. It seemed like most of them were unhappy with their marks. Although their complaints were much too quiet for the instructors to hear, Rey overheard them mumbling their discontent.

As much as she enjoyed seeing the more pretentious students knocked down a peg, she knew this didn’t bode well for her own grade. Pompous or not, her classmates could actually write, and she…well, couldn’t.

When she finally, _finally_ glanced down at her paper, what she saw was worse than any grade Ben Solo could have given her. She honestly would rather have failed. With shaking hands, she picked up her paper; scanning her eyes over and over the same phrase, just to make sure she wasn’t losing her mind.

_See me after class._

Her world was over. Plain as that. Screw graduating, this was so not worth the diploma.

Rey forced her eyes to the clock and realized there was only ten minutes until the end of the period. She wondered if she would pass out before then.

Her eyes combed over the poem in front of her, and her heart sank as she recalled the more intricate details of her previous writing. She swallowed shakily as she reread it to herself.

_He’s sitting there in the corner, a scowl on his red lips. It’s a quiet scowl, but it doesn’t make me feel unsettled, the way scowls should. His thoughtful gaze takes over his face. He has the type of face where you notice the nose and the ears before you notice the actual face itself. Those ears. They stick out far from his head, and they make me feel like he’s listening, but he watches instead. I watch him back, and look away when he catches me. It’s strange, I feel odd when he looks at me. It’s not a bad feeling, it’s sort of nice, I suppose. It’s hard to tell if he’s handsome, but there’s something quiet about his presence, and that’s different from what I’m used to. I want to help him or talk to him. Ask him where he’s from and actually figure out how old he is. Ask him if he likes writing or if it’s all just for show, like the way it is for me. He looks like he would be good at it. The loneliest people seem like they have the most to say._

Rey swallowed the lump in her throat and sucked down the tears forming in her eyes.

It wasn’t even a good poem. She was about to be humiliated _and_ probably get a failing grade.

When class inevitably ended, Rey watched as Ben crossed to Skywalker’s desk. He murmured something to the older man, and the latter frowned before his eyes flickered to the back of the room. Rey immediately dropped her head, pretending to tie her shoe. As the rest of the students filed out, she honestly debated following them. But she couldn’t. She needed to pass this class.

When she raised her head again, she found to her horror that Professor Skywalker was gathering up his items.

“Have a great weekend, Rey,” he called to her, before nodding to Ben. And then he left. And she was alone. With him.

His eyes met hers.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Absolutely stunned by the response to this story. Popular demand requires I give you some more chapters! Something I’ve found that I like about AU is that I can churn out chapters much faster, given that the characters are in MY universe now. 
> 
> If you are interested in checking out a Star Wars universe story, feel free to look over my completed work entitled “Show Me the Dark Side.” ;)

            Rey’s feet took her to the front of the room without her own accord. At the sound of her approaching movements, Ben glanced up from where he leaned against the front of Skywalker’s desk. His expression, damn him, was unreadable.

Rey gulped. “Am I in trouble?”

Ben raised an eyebrow at this, and the facial movement caught Rey off guard. He was actually quite expressive, she thought, when he wanted to be. Despite the situation it was a relief to see his mask break.

“Why would you be in trouble?” he asked carefully.

Her face was bright red again; she just knew it. “W-well, it’s never a _good_ thing to see a note like that on an assignment.”

“In this case it is.”

A chill ran up her spine for reasons unknown. Wait, was he saying he _liked_ her work?

“I know you hate it here,” he continued, his large hands coming out to grip the edge of desk. Rey’s eyes flickered to his bare forearms, watching the muscle tension travel up his arm until it disappeared into the sleeves of his button down. “You’re only here because you have to be. What you have now, on this paper…it’s raw. But it’s a good start.” He paused. “I could teach you, so that next time, when Skywalker’s the one grading, you’ll receive perfect marks.”

She blinked in shock. “So I’m…not in trouble,” she clarified, her stomach flipping when the corner of his mouth twitched in the beginnings of a smile.

“No.”

“B-but why would you want to teach me? Don’t you hate it here too?” she asked before she could stop herself. She stared down at her shoes, finding his gaze was making her feel strange.

“Because you seem like you have the most to say,” he said, and she glanced up in surprise.

_The loneliest people seem like they have the most to say._

Was he calling her lonely? Well, in fairness she had implied that he was first. Rey shuffled her feet, also recalling she had written that she wasn’t sure if he was handsome. Why was he being so nice when she had practically insulted him?

She wasn’t lonely though. Not in the way he seemed to be. She had Finn and…and…

“Alright,” she said at last, her frustration with her own life making her decision for her.

“Great.” He reached into his pocket and pulled out his phone. She blinked as he extended it towards her. “Put in your number.” When she didn’t reach out to take the device from him right away, he paused. “Unless that makes you uncomfortable.”

“What? No! No, it’s fine,” she said, reaching for the phone. “Would Professor Skywalker be okay with this?” She caught his grimace when she brought up the professor, and she vaguely wondered what their relationship was like. “He…doesn’t have to know,” she added, feeling like it would ease his mind.

He nodded curtly, and then stood to leave. “I’ll text you tonight. We can meet after next class again, if you find yourself at a loss.”

Rey’s lips curled in disdain as she glanced around the classroom. “Do we have to meet here?” she questioned, running a hand over her sweaty forehead.

He raised one of his thick eyebrows again. “Why wouldn’t we?”

“It’s just so…stuffy.” It made her anxious honestly. She could barely think of topics to write about as it was, without the added treat of wondering if she had pit stains.

“Where do you suggest we meet then?”

“Where do you live?” she inquired, and then immediately choked when she saw his bewildered expression. “S-so I can pick a place that’s close to both of us,” she hastily added.

He relaxed, and his eyes ran over her face. He almost looked amused. “We can figure it out,” he said, and then he was gone.

That night Rey met Poe via video call. He was with Finn, no surprise there, but what intrigued her was that he was quite handsome. When the phone was returned to Finn on the other side, Rey raised a questioning eyebrow and her friend flushed.

“Don’t look at me like that,” he hissed playfully, angling the phone away from Poe this time.

“Like what?” she asked innocently, but she gave him a gentle smile.

Finn laughed and she thought it was from her response, but then she realized he was looking at something out of her view, most likely Poe.

“Hey, I gotta go, Rey. I’ll talk to you soon.”

“Oh, alright. Sure.”

The call ended.

Rey sighed as she lay down on her bed. She was happy that Finn had found Poe, but she couldn’t lie. She was feeling a bit jealous. She didn’t have Finn’s charismatic personality. Making friends was difficult for her. It had been a blessing to be able to find Finn at all.

She glanced around her empty apartment, listening to the old creaks of the broken AC unit. Maybe she was lonely.

She felt her pocket vibrate and she became excited, thinking Finn had texted her. When she glanced at her screen, however, she found she didn’t recognize the number. She read the message.

_Ben Solo._

She had to chuckle at his utterly bland introductory text. There was something awkward about him that she honestly found a bit endearing.

**_Is that how you begin all of your conversations?_ **

She pressed send, and began tapping her foot, waiting for a response. It came within moments.

_Not usually, no._

_Do you need help with tonight’s assignment?_

Rey froze. Had Skywalker given them homework? Had she been too stuck in her mortified haze to notice?

**_Um_ **

**_Could you remind me what it was about again?_ **

**_I mean, I know. I was paying attention_ **

**_I just want to hear you say it_ **

Smooth, Rey. He’d never figure that one out. She glanced down at her screen again.

_There wasn’t one. I was testing you._

She huffed. **_Rude._**

She imagined the corners of his mouth turning up as he read her text. And then-

_It’s a reasonable thing to do, seeing as my big ears are so distracting._

Rey’s face burned. There was no question now. He definitely knew she had written about him.

**_I’m really, really sorry about that._ **

**_I just…couldn’t think of anything and-_ **

She was halfway through the second message when he sent one of his own.

_It’s alright._

_I liked it._

Something low in her stomach flipped as a new flush spread across her chest. She didn’t even know how to respond to that, but it turned out she didn’t need to.

_I have a place for us. If you’re free tomorrow._

What exactly had she gotten herself into?

 

 

            She met him at the location he had sent her, finding it was only a twenty minute stroll from her apartment. The busy walkways of the city branched out into a gravel trail, cutting through a park where families could enjoy each other’s company.

So clearly Rey had no reason to ever have been here.

She walked along the path as instructed, briefly wondering if she was going the right way. Eventually she came upon a quaint gazebo. It was close enough to the park that she could still hear and see the families playing, but it was far enough that it created a sense of privacy. And if she was going to be discussing poetry of all things, that was most definitely a requirement.

“Is this better than a classroom?” Ben asked, and she peered through the gazebo, noticing he was already seated inside.

“Much better.” She walked up the stairs and into the shelter, sitting across from him. She began unloading her writing journal. “How do you know about this place?”

“I found it years ago,” he admitted, glancing out through the thin wall of leaves to study the other families there. Rey wondered if he had ever come here with his own family, with Skywalker even.

Suddenly her curiosity overcame her. “Skywalker…is he your…father?”

Ben snorted. “My uncle.”

“Oh.”

“What do you need help with?” he asked, his tone brusque in his attempt to steer the subject.

Rey opened her mouth to speak but what came out was not as articulate as she would have liked. “Well, I…you see…everything?” She winced. “I guess I’m not the best with my words.”

His mask cracked a bit more, and to her, she had already made progress.

He went over meter with her again, and when the second hour came and went, she realized she was actually starting to get the hang of it. Sort of. She still thought poetry was a waste of time though.

When the third hour began they had all but abandoned the tutoring session, choosing instead to engage in conversation. Her journal lay forgotten on the wooden floor. At some point Rey had moved across the gazebo to sit beside him. She enjoyed watching his raven locks bob in the light summer breeze.

“…You sound like a masochist,” he was saying.

Rey straightened indignantly. “No. I’m just _saying_ it’s nice to see that they’re getting what’s coming to them.”

“Why do you hate them so much?”

She scrunched up her nose. “You’ve seen their expressions when I read my work in class. They think I’m a joke.”

“And your work isn’t a joke?” he probed.

“Well… _sometimes_ I take it seriously,” she mumbled, but she beamed when she heard him chuckle. “What about you? Why are you even there? You look about as miserable as I feel.”

His smile faded and he ran a hand through his hair. “That’s a long story.”

“That’s just another way of saying none of your business.”

He smirked at her, and then his eyes trailed over to get a peek at the sky. “It’s getting late.”

Rey saw he was right. The sun had almost completely set. “Oh,” she said lamely, disappointed that it seemed like he was dismissing their session.

He cleared his throat a couple of times, and Rey noticed how shy he suddenly was. Clumsy, even. “Would you…would you want to get a drink?” He glanced at her, and then a fleeting look of panic crossed his face as something occurred to him. “You’re legal right?”  

She nodded, too shocked to speak. He wanted to get a drink with her? He enjoyed her company that much?

“Yeah, um, yeah let’s do that.” God, she really needed to get a grip on her words.

They walked a few blocks down to a bar, Rey feeling silly for having her school bag with her. That minor detail was forgotten, however, once they had entered, and she had a drink in her hand. She took a sip and grimaced, and Ben chuckled again.

“Not your drink?” he guessed.

She shrugged. “I thought it would be good.”

Ben wordlessly swapped their glasses. “Try mine.”

“Okay.” She did. It was significantly better. “Thanks.”

“Sure.”

She took a few more sips just to calm her nerves. What could she possibly ask him that he wouldn’t get offended by? He seemed like such a closed book. Luckily, he spoke first, saving her from having to become creative. That seemed to be a recurring weakness of hers.

“What are your plans after graduation?”

Rey paused. “I’m not sure. Maybe stay here a while. And then maybe move far away.”

He finished his drink. “I’m sure your parents won’t like that.”

“We’re…not exactly in contact.”

“Oh.” A beat. “Sorry.”

“It’s alright.” Rey’s knee was bouncing. “What about you? Do you have another job?”

He hesitated. “I work with my mother.”

“Is that not a good thing?”

“Depends on who you ask. She’s polarized across the state.”

“You mean politically?” Rey inquired, confused.

He nodded. “She’s a senator.”

Rey’s eyes widened. “You’re Senator Organa’s son?” Which meant he was also the son of Han Solo, the action movie star. His parents were well known throughout the area, the country even, but she hadn’t known they had any children. Ben had apparently found a way to stay out of the limelight.

“Mm,” he grunted, taking a sip of the new drink in front of him.

Rey sensed he was becoming closed off again, so she switched the subject. “I still can’t believe you think I’m a masochist.”

To her delight, he grinned. “You’ve got the qualities of one. We already know how you enjoy watching people.”

She blushed. “That’s not fair.”

He leaned in a bit. “Be honest, what about me caught your eye first? The ears? The nose? Or was it just my overall unconventional looks?”

It had been the ears, but she wasn’t going to tell _him_ that. “Unconventional isn’t bad.”

“Says who?”

“ _I_ don’t think it’s bad. Besides, you probably have intensified senses.”

Oh lord, she was flirting with him…or attempting to at least. She was starting to get flustered as she became aware of it. He was too close for her to think straight, so she did the first thing that came to her mind. She reached out and honked his nose.

He jerked back, a startled laugh escaping his mouth before he composed himself quickly. She laughed too, her blush beginning to fade. She was becoming more comfortable around him, and it had nothing to do with her drink.

As they settled into silence, something suddenly occurred to Rey. She caught his eye. “Is this allowed?”

“Is what allowed?”

She gestured between her and him and the bar in general.

“Probably not,” he told her honestly.

She nodded, expecting as much. “Will you get in trouble?”

“Probably.”

She gulped. “I wouldn’t want you to get in trouble.”

“Are you having a good time?”

She blinked several times, confused by the question. “Yes.” Hadn’t that been obvious?

“Then it’s worth it.”

 

 

            He walked her home that night. It was a nice gesture, and so utterly foreign to Rey. No one had ever done that for her on a date before. But this wasn’t a date. This was just two people spending time together. She kind of liked the idea of that more.

They paused outside of her apartment building. His hands were in his pockets, and Rey’s eyes went to his muscled forearms again. She wasn’t sure what to do.

She cleared her throat and readjusted her school bag on her shoulder. “Thank you for helping me.”

“Sure.”

“I’ll, um, see you in class?”

He nodded, but she could see it was a little forced. “Sure.”

They stood there, and then he shifted closer to her. For a moment she thought he was going to shake her hand, and he must have been about to but then realized how foolish the notion would be. His hand hovered in the air for a moment, but it was too late to rescind it, so he gracelessly patted the top of her head.

She burst out laughing from his uncomfortable expression, her shoulders shaking heavily. Gradually his mouth stretched into a small smile, and she wiped the joyful tears from her eyes.

She didn’t want him to leave. She hadn’t had a connection with someone since Finn, but he was off living his own life now. And she…she just felt stuck.

But with Ben…

Before she had a chance to change her mind, Rey stepped closer and stood on her tiptoes, pressing a clumsy kiss to his mouth. He gripped her arms immediately and pulled away, shock radiating from his entire being.

Rey’s heart dropped. She had just made a fool of herself; she could see it all over his face. This night, this connection she thought she had with him, it had all been a fantasy. She was about to step back out of his grasp and sprint into her apartment, but his fingers tightened around her upper arms.

“H-how old are you?” he said raggedly, and she stared back, her heart beating wildly.

“Twenty-two.” When he didn’t say anything, she raised her chin, trying to regain some of her courage. “How old are _you_?”

“Not twenty-two,” he muttered, watching her cautiously. Something gave her the feeling he was self-conscious about his age.

“…I don’t mind,” she said quietly, so quietly that she thought he hadn’t heard her.

“Rey,” he murmured, and when she shuddered this time, she knew he had felt it in his hands. “I’m, uh, I don’t know if…”

He was going to turn her down. She tried to keep her face impassive, as she waited for the inevitable heartbreak.

“…If this is the best place for…this conversation…”

She hesitated, and then her hand rose to fold over one of his. “We can go inside,” she suggested nervously, her voice barely above a whisper.

When she saw his eyes darken, she knew this time he wouldn’t refuse.

She was a little embarrassed to show him her place; it wasn’t much after all. He didn’t seem to hold any disdain for her humble abode though, and she knew that because she was starting to be able to read him quite well.

He looked like he wanted to say something, like he wanted to talk things out first. Maybe it was the rum in her belly, or the taste of his lips on her own, but Rey had had enough of the ambiguities of poetry for one day.

She dropped her bag and turned, walking right up to him and taking his hand. He watched her carefully as she led him backwards into her room. His ears, those massive ears, were bright red, and it gave her comfort, knowing he was nervous too.

She retreated until the backs of her thighs hit her bed, her hand still holding his. She stared up into his darkened eyes, and then down to his red lips. He took his hand out of her grasp and placed it on her waist. It glided up her side slowly, hesitantly, until his long fingers came to the side of her breast. He paused there, for a long time. Hesitation beat throughout his fingers.

“It’s okay, Ben,” she whispered, and he squeezed his eyes shut and breathed out. The last of his restraint buckled as his mouth descended on hers.

As soon as their lips connected, his gentle nature transformed into something hungry. He groaned low his throat as his tongue pushed inside her mouth, exploring every inch of her. One hand came up to grip the back of her head, angling it in a way, so he could move further into her.

She tried fumbling with his buttons, but she gave up when his hand snaked inside of her own shirt, coming up to squeeze one of her breasts through her bra. He pushed her onto the bed and climbed over her, and she could feel how erect he was through her thin pants.

She tried to reach for his shirt again, but his hand came up to pin her wrist over her head, and something throbbed between her legs at the firm gesture. He detached his mouth from hers and brought it to her ear.

“What do you want?” he whispered huskily.

“W-what?” she asked through her haze.

“Tell me what you want,” he said, sucking on her neck now. “Articulate it.”

“Is this another lesson?” she gasped as his hand dipped inside her bra, his thumb rubbing over her nipple.

“I know you can tell me,” he said, raising his body slightly so he could look at her. “What do you want me to do to you?”

Her face was so hot. Rey was many things, but she certainly wasn’t vocal, not when it came to this. But it was his job to make her more articulate, even if the methods varied…quite a bit from the traditional route.

“Touch me,” she squeaked, hoping this was what he wanted to hear.

His lips twitched. “Touch you where?”

He wasn’t letting her off easy. “My…breasts?”

He began to unbutton her shirt, slowly, kissing up her stomach as more and more of her skin became visible. “Better. How do you want me to touch your breasts, Rey?”

She gulped, realizing if he was going to give her what she wanted, she would have to suck it up and play his game. “I want you to kiss them.”

Her shirt came off, and then her bra, and he was staring down at her. She felt a pulse from his cock against her leg, and she swallowed heavily.

“So…are you going to do it, or what?” she asked, a bit impatiently, and he chuckled before finally dipping his head, his tongue circling her nipple. His hand came up to knead her other breast, and she tangled her own hands in his hair as he worked her.

He must have been too excited to keep up his questioning game for long, because his hand traveled up her inner thigh and over the clasp of her pants. He opened them effortlessly, her green panties peeking out.

He lifted his head then, watching her as he tugged her pants down until she was just in her underwear. She should have been bothered that he was still fully clothed, but something about the way he looked at her made her feel curious. Another pulse of heat radiated between her legs.

His mouth caught hers again as they both climbed further onto her bed. The space certainly was cozy, given she only had a twin, but he didn’t seem to mind. His hand become rougher as their kissing intensified, and her hips rubbed into his cock. She smiled against his lips when he groaned again.

“Do you want me to touch your clit, Rey?” he asked between kisses.

  
“Yes,” she said breathlessly.

“Say it,” he commanded.

“I want you to touch my clit.”

His hand moved into her underwear until he located the spot he was looking for. As he began to rub her in tight circles, she closed her eyes, rocking with him.

“You’re so wet, Rey,” he moaned, his fingers starting to slide inside of her. She gasped at the friction, at the way he curved his fingers and hit the spongy place inside of her over and over.

She was panting harshly now, and he moved his lips to her ear again. “I’ve been thinking about doing this for a while,” he murmured, and she moaned as his fingers went to her clit again, rubbing faster. “Even before that fucking poem. I thought about bending you over my desk-”

“Ben,” she gasped, when she felt herself becoming close.   
“Have you ever thought about this?” he asked softly, one hand circling her clit while the other slid inside her again. “Have you ever thought about me fucking you with my fingers? Tell me.”

“I’ve thought about you,” she gasped, finding that the closer she came the easier it was to tell him how she was feeling. “Your lips and your fingers a-and your hands on my body.” His fingers kept moving and rubbing and-

“Good girl.”

Rey’s back arched off her bed as she came, her body rocking with his fingers as he continued to push into her. She rode her climax hard, and even when she came down his fingers moved in and out of her slowly.

She blinked up at him through her pleasured haze, her cheeks a bright pink. A thin sheen of sweat covered his forehead from working her, and her tongue came out to wet her lips as she watched him. When he met her eyes, she gave him a small smirk.

“Did I pass?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter: Some flirtation in the classroom, followed by…well…
> 
> Updates will be frequent!


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> After this fun little trash fic is over I’m going to write a story called “The Writings of Ben Solo.” Here’s the summary:
> 
> “The Writings of Ben Solo”
> 
> By day Rey struggles not to strangle Kylo Ren to death. It’s difficult, given they are the only two stranded on this remote planet, and he’s driving her insane. But by night, she finds herself captivated by the romantic journal entries in her Jedi texts…and she unknowingly finds herself falling for a young Ben Solo.

            She tried not to blush when she felt his eyes on her in class the following week.

She thought he would be avoiding her eye contact at all possible costs since that night, but if anything it had awakened something in him. His gaze fell from her face down to her breasts, and the blush finally blossomed across her cheeks. She could feel his smirk as she glanced down at her paper.

“Today we are going to move on to haikus,” Skywalker was saying. “Could anyone tell me what a haiku is?”

Rey waited for someone else to raise his or her hand. Sure enough, a blonde girl with springy curls volunteered.

“It’s a three line poem. One stanza. The first line has five syllables, the second has seven, and the third has five again. It originated in Japan. The essence of haiku is ‘cutting’ or _kiru._ ”

_Okay, was that last sentence_ really  _necessary?_ Rey thought bitterly, shaking her head to herself.

“Very good,” Skywalker said, nodding at the girl. He turned to his TA. “Ben, if you could pass out some examples for the class?”

Ben wordlessly rose from his seat and began distributing papers. When he came to Rey’s desk, she realized her palms were clammy. He kept his face impassive, the mask back in place as he approached her. He set down the sheet of examples, but she saw him slide a separate note on top of the paper. Before she could question him about it, he turned abruptly and went back to his desk.

As the class read over the examples, Rey’s eyes scanned the note Ben had given her, realizing he had written a haiku of his own.

_Moan my name again_

_I want to be inside you_

_Are you getting wet?_

Um, _yeah,_ she was, actually. Rey squeezed her legs together, making a violent effort not to look at him. It didn’t matter. She could practically hear his chuckle in her ears. She was so going to get him back for this.

After Skywalker had gone over different forms of haiku, including some versions that varied from the five, seven, five format-honestly, what was the point of these rules if you could just break them anyway-before he asked his students to write their own versions.

Rey picked up her pencil and opened her notebook. She stared at the blank page in front of her, facing her usual problem. She chewed on the end of her pencil, trying to think of a topic. Maybe she could pick an emotion. Joy. There, that was easy.

_Think of a memory,_ she remembered, and instantly the other night with Ben came into her mind. She stifled another blush, and instead thought of how she had felt before their little nighttime activity. She had genuinely felt happy with him, after all.

She wrote down her poem and found she didn’t detest it as she had all the others. Oh it was still awful, but maybe when she would have to read it out loud next class, she wouldn’t get quite as many jeers. Maybe she would run it by Ben just in case. But then again, she sort of wanted to keep this one to herself.

“Your homework is to continue practicing haikus,” Skywalker continued. “Write at least five. You can choose the one you like the best, including the one you wrote today, to read for next class. I’ll see you all Thursday.”

Rey was slow to rise as the class was dismissed. She hadn’t talked to Ben since their tutoring session a couple of days ago, and she sort of missed his companionship. Maybe they could figure out another time to, um, practice poetry.

“Rey? Is everything alright?” Professor Skywalker asked when he noticed she hadn’t left with the other students.

“Oh, uh, yes, Professor. I was just going to ask Ben a question about my grade from the last assignment,” she said, rising from her chair.

The older man nodded, his eyes moving over to look at his TA. “Alright then. See you next class.” He shuffled out of the room as Rey came down to the front, her items in her hands.

She placed her bag by Skywalker’s desk and then moved to stand in front of Ben’s. At her approach he glanced up coolly, leaning back in his chair.

“Come to complain about your grade?” he asked.

She had gotten an 87%, which was more than fair according to her, but she had needed to come up with a quick excuse for the professor.

“Not exactly,” she replied, folding her hands in front of her.

His eyes roamed over her. “What then?”

She shrugged. “That was an interesting haiku you wrote me.”

The corner of his mouth jerked up. “I trust you understand the format, now?”

She rolled her eyes. “You’re just lucky no one was looking. I don’t exactly have the best poker face.”

“No,” he said, leaning forward and folding his hands on his desk. “You don’t.”

She hated to blush again in front of him, so she decided to give him a taste of his own medicine. She tapped her chin, pretending to think.

“Didn’t you once tell me that you’ve thought about me here?” Her eyes slid to him. “Bending me over this desk?”

He choked in surprise as his composure cracked, but he cleared his throat. “What about it?”

“Are you thinking about it now?”

His shoulders stiffened. “Rey,” he said warningly. “We can’t. Not here.”

She chuckled. “I know. _That_ would be too out in the open.” She paced over to him, reaching out a foot and giving his chair a firm nudge back, away from his desk.

“What are you doing?”

Despite the cool expression on her face, Rey was internally freaking out. She had been thinking about their night together a lot, particularly about how she hadn’t exactly returned the favor…and she knew for a fact that he thought about doing things here.

“Just…trust me okay?” she said, crawling under his desk until she was completely hidden from view. He stared down at her blankly as she tugged his chair back into place. It was only when her hand came up to touch his knee that understanding raked across his face.

“Rey-”

“If you really don’t want me to, I won’t,” she told him, her heart in her throat. To be honest, she had never actually done this before. Sure she had gone on dates, but everything after had been rushed and clumsy, and she had never had the nerve to do this anyway. But something about Ben told her that he wouldn’t make fun of her, even if she had no clue what she was doing.

She glanced up, waiting for him to refuse, but he swallowed heavily and nodded.

It was a go then.

Her hands came up to unbuckle his belt, a shot of arousal spiking through her when she realized he was already hard. She unzipped his pants and then paused before reaching out to stroke him through his boxers. She felt him watching her with baited breath, and she pushed down her nerves as found his cock and gently tugged it free.

She couldn’t believe she was about to do this. She hoped he would like it.

Gently taking his length in her hand, she positioned her mouth over his head and moved up and down slowly, her saliva coating him with every bob of her head. She heard him groan softly, and she experimented with the shape of her mouth, trying to figure out what was the most effective. Eventually she discovered that if she moved her hand down to the base with her mouth, she could envelop all of him.

She repeated the movement over and over again, her jaw becoming sore, but the place between her legs throbbing every time he made a noise. His hand became entangled in her hair, releasing the bun she wore, so her tresses came tumbling down her back. When her tongue circled his tip he swore, and she couldn’t help but think how inarticulate _he_ was when she was the one pleasuring him.

Rey drew back and pursed her lips. His eyes flickered down to her, a faint blush along his cheeks.

“Your words aren’t inspiring confidence,” she said to him cheekily, and he snorted, but he got the hint. When she placed her mouth on him again he started to talk like he had that night. He told her the things he wanted to do to her, that he wanted her to do to him. When he talked about sliding his fingers into her, the memory caused a small moan to escape her own mouth.

She felt his thighs tense, as she hummed against him, increasing her pace. The hand at the back of her head gripped her firmly now, and she peeked up at him to gauge his reaction. His eyes were closed and droplets of sweat scattered across his neck. Each time he swallowed his Adam’s apple would bob, his shoulders tensing ever time she ran back over him.

Just when she thought he was so tense that he might break, he abruptly relaxed and in the next moment, he spilled into her mouth. Rey swallowed part of it in surprise, wincing at the taste. The rest cascaded down her chin, and she tried to catch some of it. Ben’s eyes found hers, and she turned away from him.

“Don’t be embarrassed,” he said, buckling his pants as she hastily wiped her face. When she still wouldn’t quite look at him, he curled his fingers around her wrist and tugged her up into his lap. Rey let out small noise of surprise, and blinked down at him, finding he was still hard despite his release.

“Was it…good?” she asked hesitantly, her eyes drifting to his ears because she couldn’t look at his eyes for some reason.

His body shook beneath her, and her eyes finally snapped to him, discovering he was chuckling. He reached out and brushed her hair away from her reddened face.

“You’re something else.”

 

 

            “I don’t see why I should have to write _five_ haikus. Wasn’t the one in class good enough?” Rey scrunched her nose up stubbornly, shifting her weight on the gazebo bench.

“You never showed me what you wrote,” Ben reminded her, his elbows propped against the wooden railing. Rey bit the inside of her cheek, pretending to write intently in her notebook. Ben raised his eyebrows. “Are you going to share or…?”

“No.”

A short bewildered laugh escaped him. “No?”

“You’ll just have to wait for me to read it in class.”

“That confident in your writing already?” he teased.

Rey shrugged. The truth was the haiku she had written was the most real thing she had put on paper thus far, but it was…intimate. Not intimate like in the way she and Ben did things but just…it exposed more of herself than she normally preferred.

Ben pretended to be hurt. “I guess you won’t need me for much longer.”

She looked up to see he had a mischievous glint in his eye. She gave him a small smile, but it faded when he dipped his head slightly. Her breath caught in her throat. Was he going to kiss her? He had never done so in a public place before, only when they were entirely alone. She raised her chin slightly, leaning forward as she watched his eyes begin to close-

“Rey?”

They jerked apart, and Rey whipped her head to the side to see who had called her. When she discovered the source, a huge smile broke across her face, and she leaped over the gazebo railing in her excitement. She ran into the outstretched arms of Finn, her best friend hugging her back tightly.

“You didn’t tell me you were in town,” she said, her voice practically shaking with joy.

Finn shrugged. “Thought I’d surprise you.”

She whacked his shoulder for that, and he pretended to flinch. Rey’s eyes flashed to the side as someone came up to them, and she smiled as she recognized Poe.

“So this is the Rey I’ve heard all about,” he said, extending his hand. “Poe Dameron.”

“Rey.” She didn’t like saying her last name. It reminded her too much of her absent parents. She took his hand and shook it firmly. “It’s nice to meet you in person.”

“Likewise. Finn has told me so much about you.”

“All good things I hope,” Rey said, smirking at Finn. When her eyes went back to Poe she noticed his charming smile had disappeared, a tense look gliding over his features.

Rey turned her heard and realized Ben had walked up to stand beside her, curiosity of who she had hugged probably getting the better of him. The expression on his face was equally as uncomfortable, and the scowl that adorned his mouth was fiercer than Rey had ever seen.

“Dameron.”

“Solo.”

“…Do you guys know each other?” Finn asked, looking back and forth between the two men.

Poe crossed his arms. “Kylo and I go way back.”

“ _This_ is Kylo?” Finn questioned incredulously.  

“It’s Ben actually,” Ben replied through clenched teeth.

Poe raised his eyebrows in mock interest. “Oh, you decided to switch back? That’s great to hear.”

Rey panicked. This was not how she imagined her first meeting with Poe to go. She certainly hadn’t expected Ben to be there, and now that he was she _definitely_ hadn’t expected them to hate each other.

“How do you guys know each other?” Finn questioned Rey, still shocked that Ben was this Kylo person Poe had apparently told him about.

“He’s my friend,” Rey replied the same time Ben said, “I’m her tutor.”

Rey immediately flushed, discovering she had put Ben in an uncomfortable situation.

“He’s my tutor,” she amended. “He’s helping me with my poetry class.”

“Ah. It must kill you to be working under Skywalker,” Poe commented, and Rey watched as Ben’s hands curled into fists.

She placed a hand on Ben’s chest. “I think we should go. It was…nice to meet you Poe. I’ll see you later Finn,” Rey said, giving her friend a desperate look before ushering Ben away.

 

 

            “I’m sorry, I didn’t realize you two knew each other,” Rey said later, when they were in his apartment. She poured each of them a glass of wine and set it on the coffee table, before slumping to the floor beside him.

Ben was silent.

Rey sighed. “You know, I can’t help you if you won’t talk to me.”

“I don’t need help,” he muttered, and she rolled her eyes. She took a hefty gulp of her wine. When she set the glass back down on the table, she turned her head to him, frowning when he tried to remove her shirt. “What are you doing?”

“Get undressed.”

Rey smacked his hands away. “Not while you’re like this. I’m not going to be used just because you’re mopey.”

Ben frowned, but he removed his hands. “I wouldn’t use you,” he mumbled.

She sighed again, and then leaned her head on his shoulder. “You’re always saying I’m the one who needs to be more articulate. You’re right, of course, but I just wish you would open up a little more.”

His hand ran over hers, briefly entangling with her own. She stared down at their appendages, studying the connection. Despite everything else they had done, this seemed like it was the most intimate.

“Alright,” he said quietly, and she raised her head to look at him.

He had a rough relationship with his father. Han was often absent, and when he was home he expected Ben to be just like him. Charming, witty, outgoing, and good with the ladies. Ben wasn’t any of that. He was quiet. He was studious. He didn’t really know how to talk to girls.

He and Poe had attended pilot school together. Poe admired both of Ben’s parents, and would show off to them whenever he could. Ben suspected that Han preferred Poe as a son to him.

Starting from high school and extending into his time at the flight academy, Ben would often get in trouble with the law. He would steal things, vandalize things. His father would yell at him, saying how it always put his mother in a horrible position. His mother, Leia, didn’t chastise him. She was afraid for him, afraid _of_ him.

She and Professor Skywalker-Rey discovered his name was Luke-had had an abusive father growing up. Leia didn’t want her son turning into that awful man.

When Ben had attempted to steal an aircraft after a heated argument with his father, that’s when Leia finally put her foot down. He had done time for his actions, of course. Eight months. When he got out, nobody wanted to hire him and he couldn’t very well work for his mother anymore…but then his Uncle Luke needed a TA for the summer.

When he finished Rey watched him, but not with sympathy. He had made his own destructive choices after all, but she was no stranger to such decisions. She had her own baggage as well…so when she looked at him, it was with understanding.

“Thank you for telling me,” she said softly, squeezing his hand.

His thumb brushed over the back of her hand. “Thank you for listening.”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> More to follow :)


	4. Chapter 4

_“I’m just saying, Rey. Poe says he’s a really bad guy!”_

Rey rubbed the bridge of her nose. “I _know_ Poe doesn’t like him, Finn. I get it. Look, Ben’s made some mistakes, but he’s trying to put himself on the right path. Maybe Poe should give him another chance.”

_“I doubt it. He’s really close with Kylo’s-”_

“ _Ben_ ,” she emphasized.

_“-Ben’s folks. He says he really hurt them.”_

“Like I said, he’s made some mistakes.”

Finn paused on the other line. _“Rey…you and he aren’t…you know…”_

Rey frowned. “Why does that matter?”

_“Well, just because of everything I know and also because he’s just…he’s way too old for you.”_

“And Poe isn’t too old for you?” she challenged.

Finn choked on the other end of the line. _“It’s not like that with Poe.”_

Rey snorted. “Well, whatever it is…just…don’t lecture me about the choices I make.”

_“…You’re right. I’m sorry. It’s none of my business.”_

She sighed. “I don’t want to fight. Can we agree to disagree and just move on?”

_“Sure, Rey. Hey, let me take you out to dinner some time.”_

Rey glanced up as Ben entered the room, changing his shirt in front of her. She had spent the night in his apartment, and although they hadn’t done anything the night before, she knew she needed to be there for him. He had shared so much with her.

She bit her lip as she caught glimpses of his naked back. Despite their hook up sessions, Rey didn’t get a lot of time to study him unclothed. Every time they had gotten together it had been needy and frantic; they had only undressed the parts necessary. That would have to change, and soon.

“Sure, dinner sounds nice,” she said to Finn, glancing down when she caught Ben’s jealous look. “Listen, I’ll talk to you later.”

_“Okay. Bye, Rey.”_

Rey hung up the phone and swiveled her chin to Ben, who regarded her with crossed arms and a pout on his face.

“That your friend?” he asked grumpily.

“Yes. Is there a problem?”

He grunted, but didn’t say anything further. Rey glanced at the clock on his beside table. Technically they still had thirty minutes before they had to leave for class…

When his back was turned, she came up behind him and wrapped her arms around his waist. He stiffened in surprise but relaxed as she began to stroke him over his pants. She smiled against his shoulder blade when she felt him grow under her touch.

“Don’t you think it’s a little early for this?” he said huskily, his tone letting her know that he was completely joking. He swallowed a moan as her hand snaked its way into his boxers to wrap around him.

“Mm, I might need a bit of a warm up before class.” She moved up and down his length, steadily increasing her speed. She felt smug when he leaned forward, his hands bracing against the dresser, his hair falling down over his face.

“Keep talking to me,” he panted, and she paused in her movements. Ben glanced over his shoulder smirking. “Come on. I know you can.”

She swallowed nervously, but began to move her hand again. She came closer behind him, and although she wasn’t tall enough to press her lips to his ear, she leaned her face against his back.

“I love doing this,” she whispered, pushing past her nerves.  _Just say what you feel._ “I love hearing you moan. I love it when you say my name.” She bit her lip, increasing her speed. “I don’t know how you do it, Ben. In class you just…you just look at me and I’m so wet.” He groaned again, and she could tell he was close. “I loved s-sucking your cock…getting on my knees in front of you.” She gulped, feeling her own arousal climb. “When you…when you came in my mouth I-I felt-”

She didn’t get to finish, because at that moment _he_ did. He spilled himself into her hand, but she continued to move up and down, stroking him until he placed a hand to still her. He stepped away briefly to clean up the mess, and when he came back her hands were folded in front of her.

“How was that?” Her fingers twisted together.

A grin split across his face, one of those rare ones that took her breath away. He came to her and lifted her by the back of her thighs, tossing her lightly onto his bed. He climbed over her to kiss her mouth, sliding his tongue slowly in and out.

“That was exceptional,” he murmured, moving to kiss her jaw, and then down her neck and stomach.

Rey propped herself on her elbows, blinking as he got on his knees in front of her. “Ben?”

“We’re going to be late to class,” he said matter of factly, tugging her pants off and flinging them to the ground. He pressed his thumb to the outside of her panties and inhaled sharply when he felt how damp they were.

Rey hesitated, knowing she should protest. “We should really go…”

He hooked his fingers into her panties and dragged them over her knees, down to the floor. He spread her thighs and moved in between them.

“We’ll go after you come,” he said, and her eyes glazed over as he buried his face in between her legs.

Rey instantly fell back onto the bed, her fingers gripping her sheets as she let out a soft moan. She hadn’t known what this would feel like, and now that she did, she didn’t ever want it to stop.

His tongue moved wildly over her clit, and her hands wove themselves into his hair. He ate her hungrily, holding down her thighs when they started to shake. She climbed higher and higher, her mouth hung open as she gasped.

“Ben, _Ben,_ _oh, oh Ben.”_ Over and over again. She was a broken record.

She propped her body up again, watching as he licked her. His eyes met hers at one point, and normally she would have been embarrassed, but she was just so intrigued. He kept his eyes on her as he circled his tongue, then very deliberately slid two of his fingers into her, curving them in an arc. She watched him with pink cheeks and parted lips. She finally closed her eyes, giving into the feeling.

When she came her entire body shook with it, until she was a quivering, trembling mess. She opened her eyes again just in time to see Ben suck his fingers dry.

She blinked lazily at him, finding she didn’t know what to say. He gave her a small grin and then placed her pants over her legs.   
“Let’s get you to class.”

 

            They staggered their arrival times, obviously. They weren’t completely naïve.

Rey felt bad for showing up late though. She hated disrupting a class, and she really did want to please Professor Skywalker. She took her seat in the back of the room as always, and ten minutes later Ben made his appearance. If Skywalker suspected any foul play he didn’t say a word.

Rey caught the eye of one of the students, the blonde girl with the curls, and she frowned when the girl narrowed her blue eyes at her. Rey held the eye contact, refusing to back down but at the same time wondering what this girl’s problem was. Eventually as the other students in the classroom began to present their work, the blonde looked away.

She half-listened to the other students as they read their haikus, and with each one Rey’s heart sank a little further. She was suddenly becoming less and less confident with her own work. She made a hasty edit to the second line, substituting the word ‘cheek’ for ‘hand.’ Hopefully that would make what she was feeling clearer. When Skywalker eventually called on her to read her own, she stood, grasping her journal with shaky hands. She stared intently down at the paper, knowing she couldn’t for the life of her look at Ben.

_I know I’m no one_

_But when he touches my hand_

_I’m not so alone_

Did she dare look up at the class? Her eyes slowly rose and scanned the expressions of her fellow students. Some of them-the blonde girl included-still smirked at her from behind their hands. A couple of them, however, nodded slowly, and Rey knew by now that people did this when they liked a poem.

“Very good, Rey,” Skywalker said, giving her a smile. “You’re becoming quite the poet.”

Rey gave him a sheepish smile and sat down. She still couldn’t look at Ben.

When class ended she didn’t wait for him. She gathered up her things and was the first out of the room. Why did she think this was a good idea? What they had, their relationship if one could even call it that, was purely physical. Okay, well maybe it was a little more than that, but there was no way he was feeling the things she felt to the extent that she felt them. To him she was probably just a stuttering child who couldn’t even find the courage to glance at him in class anymore.

When she returned to her apartment, she received a text.

_What’s wrong?_

She debated not answering, but she didn’t think he deserved that.

**_Nothing! I was in a rush!_** Dear lord, even her text sounded forced. She watched her phone as he typed back.

_Can I come over?_

**_Um_ **

**_I’m kind of busy_ **

_Okay._

Rey sighed as she put her phone on her bedside table. She closed her eyes and leaned against the wall. Her phone vibrated once more, and she turned her head, her heart jumping into her throat when she saw his next message.

_We need to talk._

 

            Eventually, she decided to go over to his place, figuring that if things became too awkward she could leave whenever she wanted. As she walked to his apartment, she put up mental barriers along the way. She had to prepare herself for the heartbreak that was bound to happen. He was going to end this. Whatever  _this_ was.

When he answered the door, the mask was back in place. “Hi.”

“Hi.”

She shuffled her feet, and when he moved aside, she hesitated before entering. She crossed over to his couch but didn’t sit down, thinking this wouldn’t take long.

He sat in the chair across from her. An uncomfortable silence filled the air.

When she couldn’t bear it anymore she decided to speak. “I know you’re upset. I…I don’t blame you. I should never have read that stupid haiku.” Her eyes pricked with tears. “I shouldn’t have written that first poem either. About your ears. I feel so…so stupid.” Her words were escaping her again, and she angrily wiped at her eyes.

When she finally had the courage to gauge his reaction she saw the mask hadn’t moved. But he kept swallowing. And blinking. Rey parted her lips as she realized something. He was nervous.

“I’m not upset,” he said quietly, and her eyes widened. “But what we’re doing now…I don’t feel right about it. You made me realize that earlier today.”

Here it comes. Keep it together, don’t cry, don’t cry.

“I’d like to take you out on a date.”

Rey stilled, unsure if she’d heard him correctly. “You…”

He cleared his throat, and his mask finally caved, revealing the anxiety pooling beneath. “I’d like to take you out, if you’re okay with that. I don’t just…I can’t just have you one way.” His ears were pink now, and the color was enough to bring Rey’s senses back to her.

“I’d like that too,” she said softly, watching as relief broke across his face. She came over to him then and stood between his legs. She held his face in her hands, angling it towards her, so when she bent down their lips easily connected.

He leaned into her touch, slowly standing up and grasping the back of her thighs. He picked her up and wound her legs around his waist, maneuvering them into his bedroom.

Their clothes came off layer by layer. When his shirt came over his head, Rey ran her hands over his torso, glad to finally have him like this. When the last of their clothes fell to the ground, they stood before each other, both stark naked for the first time.

Ben’s eye ran up her body before he covered her, his hand coming down to rub her in slow circles. Their kisses, normally charged with such heat, were softer, lazier. When Rey began to gasp he removed his hand and aligned his hips with hers. He watched her, a silent question in his eyes. She swallowed and nodded, and his hand fumbled into his bedside drawer. He retrieved the protection and broke the seal, Rey closing her eyes as she heard him slide it over himself. As the head of his cock pressed against her entrance, she opened her eyes and stared up at his face, between his curtains of hair. They kept their eyes locked as he pushed into her slowly, and she bit her lip to keep from grimacing. It was uncomfortable, but with each careful thrust the tightness began to ebb.

After a few minutes she began to feel the faint pulse of arousal again, and he began to pick up his pace. He dropped to kiss her neck as his hips plunged into her, angling himself in a way so he began to hit that place inside of her, the one that made stars appear before her eyes.

“God, you’re so tight,” he growled against her throat, and a tremor went through her from his words. “Do you like it when I fuck you?”

“Yes,” she panted her eyes squeezed shut. “Ben…I want you to…to touch my clit.”

She felt him smile against her neck and realized the request had come to her more naturally than it ever had. His hand slipped between them as he rubbed her clit again, his lips never leaving her neck.

With the added pleasure she began to feel herself on the edge, and she shifted her hips in time with his. She felt the pressure building from both the places he touched her, and when she came for the second time that day, she wasn’t entirely sure which way had made her do it.

As she came down she watched his shoulders shudder as he rammed into her, and after several more strokes, a heat spread between her legs. His head dipped to capture her lips for a few moments before he removed himself, rolling off the condom and flinging it into the trash.

Rey ran a hand over her sweaty forehead, smiling at him teasingly. “I could be wrong, but isn’t this normally supposed to happen _after_ the date?”

He chuckled, grasping her by the wrist and pulling her up so he could run his hands over her rear. “I think I like it better both ways.”


	5. Chapter 5

 

            He took her to a nice, quiet restaurant on the edge of the city. It was inconspicuous enough that they wouldn’t be caught, and even if they did run into someone they knew, the setting was casual enough that their being together wouldn’t seem _too_ suspicious.

It was exciting to be out on a date again. A _real_ date. To be honest Rey had had a bit of a dry spell for most of her collegiate years, and the formality of it all made her stomach twist with nerves. But not all of them were bad.

She stared across the table at Ben, who had just ordered a bottle of wine for them. After the waiter set the bottle on the table, he caught her staring from over her glass.

“What?” he asked, raising an eyebrow.

“You don’t have to do that you know,” she said, nodding to the bottle.

“I want to,” he responded, taking a sip. “I want to impress you.”

“I’m already impressed,” she replied, trying to find his foot under the table. She ended up kicking his shin by mistake though, and she cringed as she watched his face flinch. “Sorry.”

“It’s alright.” He tried unsuccessfully to stifle his grin at her flirting attempts.

Rey took a sip of her drink. “So, are you ever going to tell me how old you are?”

Ben paused. “I’ve been avoiding answering that.”

“Why?”

“I don’t want to scare you off.”

Rey snorted. “Ben, I know you’re older. If you had the capability of scaring me off it would have happened a long time ago.” When he didn’t answer she leaned forward, a mischievous glint in her eye. “Should I guess?”

Ben gave her a semi-amused look.

She pursed her lips pretending to think. “Fifty-one?”

“Ha. Ha.”

Rey smiled, actually thinking it over this time. “Twenty-nine?”

His lips twitched. “Older.”

“Thirty-five?”

“Thirty-two.”

“Oh.” Ten years. By far the oldest man she had ever gone out with…and the only man she had ever slept with. It should have been odd, but…she found it didn’t bother her. If anything… “I like that you’re old.”

Her face instantly went tomato red. That was _not_ how she intended to express her thoughts. To her surprise, though, Ben burst out laughing.

“You always do have a way with words.”

After they ate they decided to walk down the city streets instead of taking the subway back. By now the sun had already set, basking them in the final rays of fading sunlight. As they strolled Rey shared more about her life, the way he had previously done with her.

She had been in foster care ever since she was five years old. She was constantly in between households growing up, which made settling down and making friends difficult. The worst guardian she had ever had was a man who she would only refer to as Plutt. He was an old, ugly drunk who didn’t have any qualms about smacking her around when he was in a bad mood.

When she turned fifteen she began working, saving up every nickel she had so she could get her own place when she was of age. Her exceptional marks in both math and science ending up landing her a scholarship to the same university where she had met Finn. The two clicked immediately, and they had even been roommates for a while before he graduated.

Finn got her like nobody else could. There was never anything remotely romantic between the two, which helped their living situation immensely. When he finally graduated, Rey had used the money she saved up to move into her own apartment, the one she lived in now. Finn moved to work at an airport two hours outside the city, where he had met Poe.

She didn’t tell Ben about her romantic suspicions between the two, thinking it best to leave Poe out of the conversation as much as possible. When she had finished telling him her life story, he had this look on his face that made her brain feel fuzzy.

“What is it?” she asked.

He stared at her. “It makes sense.”

“What does?”

“All of it. I can see it on your face. Your drive. It’s what drew me to you in the first place.”

Rey twisted her hands, suddenly shy. “Most people are surprised when I tell them. I guess I hide that part of myself fairly well.”

His hand brushed hers as they walked. “Not from me.”

When they reached her apartment, he tugged on her hand before she could walk up her steps. She turned to him to ask what he was doing, but his hand had already moved to her face, and his lips were on hers.

The kiss was sweet and quiet. Rey wound her arms around his waist as his lips moved, and she melted into him, the street lamps above flickering around them. Their tongues moved together slowly, and Rey swore her whole body was buzzing.

Although the embrace outside her apartment was simple and delicate, once they were inside it leaked into something intense. Eager hands tore at clothing, fingers tugged into hair, lips clashed together in a frenzy.

When they lay, tangled limbs and all, in her bed, Rey could have sobbed. This feeling, of being so intimate with someone, of being… _not alone_ , was so breathtaking that she knew she could never find the words to describe it. Ben’s hands lazily traced circles over her bare shoulder, enhancing her comfort. When the motion eventually stilled, she realized he had fallen asleep.

She raised her head to watch him; his expression was so peaceful in the low lighting of her room. She brushed a stray strand of hair that had fallen into his face and leaned over to lightly press her lips to his.

She swiveled her chin when she heard her phone vibrate, and-being mindful not to jostle Ben-she stretched her arm to pick up the device on her bedside table. When she opened the message she noticed two things. The first was that the number of the sender was unknown. The second was that the message contained a picture.

It was her and Ben locked in a passionate embrace outside her apartment, only hours ago.

An ice-cold dread spilled over her entire body, and she felt sick to her stomach. A million questions raced inside her mind, but everything went blank as she saw the sender of the picture was typing again. And then-

_Meet me at 324 Pleasant Avenue. 3:00pm tomorrow._

 

 

            Rey knew she should have told Ben about the picture and the mysterious messenger, but she needed to figure out what was going on before she worried him. She still had no idea who this person was, how they had gotten her number, or why they had that picture in their possession, but every time she thought about it she felt like throwing up.

All she had was that fucking address.

She stood outside the small boutique, exactly where the pervert had texted her. She tapped her foot impatiently, a fine sweat already breaking across her brow. Her hand gripped her phone tightly, prepared to call the police if necessary.

When she heard footsteps approaching, she glanced up and nearly dropped her phone when she recognized Poe Dameron. She immediately took a step backwards.

“What do you think you’re playing at?” she hissed, and he put his hands up in surrender.

“Listen I-”

“You’re mad! How did you…? This-this is none of your business! How could…I can’t believe Finn sees anything in you!”

“Rey,” Poe said calmly, “just give me a chance to explain.” He seemed like he was going to reach for her, but he must have decided against it. “I was sent that photo last night.”

Rey paused in her anger, regarding the pilot warily. “By who?”

“An old friend’s younger sister sent it to me.” He swallowed. “I think you might share a class with her. Blonde. Curls.”

_Her._

“I don’t u-understand,” Rey stammered, stress making her stutter.

“Her name’s Mora. We grew up together. She...knows my feelings on Kylo-uh…Ben.” Poe stuck his hands in his pockets, seeming extremely uncomfortable. “I’m not even sure if he remembers her. He was a jerk to a lot of people growing up; she was one of them. I think…I think she might be planning to show this to Skywalker.”

That did it.

“Excuse me one moment,” Rey said calmly, and then moved to a nearby trashcan. She retched violently into the bin for several seconds, before straightening up and wiping her mouth. Poe was by her side again, regarding her with worry.

“Are you okay?” he asked, a bit unnecessarily.

“Why are you telling me this?” she said, desperation lining her voice.

Poe gripped the bridge of his nose, conflict radiating off of his expression. “Look. I care about Finn, alright? And that means I care about his friends by extension.” He met her eyes. “I don’t give a damn about Ben Solo. He can rot for all I care…but I wouldn’t feel right _not_ warning _you_.” He grimaced. “I broke into Finn’s phone to get your number as soon as Mora sent me the picture. Not my best moment, but then again, neither was our introduction that day in the park. I wanted to right a couple of wrongs I guess.”

“That was pretty bold of you. Texting me out of the blue like that.”

He gave her a sheepish grin with trace amounts of his charm. “I thought you might not want to meet if you knew it was me.”

He was right. After their first in-person encounter she probably wouldn’t have. Rey studied Poe and came to the conclusion that taking big risks was probably a part of his character. Maybe that was one of the qualities Finn liked about him.

She sighed, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear. “Well…I appreciate you going out of your way to tell me. I may have misjudged you.”

Poe nodded, and then cleared his throat. “Sure. And I…uh…I hope everything works out.”

She gave him a sad smile in response.

 

 

            “What are we going to do?” Rey whispered, after she had struck up the nerve to fill Ben in on all the details. She watched him stare down at her bedroom floor, his entire body taut with tension. The longer he didn’t answer, the more nauseous she became.

“What if Dameron’s lying?” he asked, but his voice lacked the usual anger that came with discussing Poe.

“What motive would he have? He didn’t do anything but warn me. We should be grateful.”

Ben snorted. “I’ll never be grateful to him,” he said sourly.

Rey sat beside him on her bed. “Rivalries aside, this isn’t good Ben. I…I can’t be responsible for you losing this job.”

“I don’t care about this job.”

“Well you _should,_ ” Rey replied, her irritation growing. “You should care about something!”

“I care about you.”

“Enough to never find work again?” Rey sighed exasperatedly. “Ben you…you’ve _graded_ assignments of mine. Do you know how that will look? Maybe it’s not too late. Maybe…Maybe we can say something to Mora, or-or we can…we can-”

Ben wrapped his arms around Rey, and the stress of the situation finally caved in on her. She buried her face in his shoulder, squeezing him tightly and dreading what the future would bring.

 

 

            When she was in class the next day, Rey noticed Mora was absent. She found this to be odd, but maybe this was a good thing. Then she realized Skywalker was absent as well.

Seven minutes into the class period, the professor entered, muttering a distracted apology to the class. Mora followed him in, looking pleased as punch. She didn’t bother glancing in Rey’s direction; she didn’t have to. Rey already knew what she had done. She gazed over at Ben, but he kept his face down, his hands curled into fists.

Rey couldn’t have said what was talked about in class today for the life of her. She spent the whole period burning a whole in her desk with her eyes, trying to keep the tears inside. Her knuckles were white as she gripped the edge of her seat, feeling the tight grasp of panic holding her by the throat.

She wasn’t sure what this would mean for either of them. Her mind kept filling with horrible scenarios, some of which didn’t even make sense. Then again, fear wasn’t a logical emotion.

“Have a good day everyone,” Professor Skywalker said, rising from his seat.

Rey felt the familiar sensation of terror festering in her stomach when finally, _finally,_ she heard the words she’d been dreading this entire week.

“Rey, could you please stay back for a minute?”

Mora couldn’t contain herself anymore apparently, for a smug smile stretched across her face as she left. As the last of the students filtered out of the classroom, Rey rose to her feet, swaying slightly as she navigated to the front of the room. She stood on the side by the door, the farthest possible location she could be from Ben. The latter hadn’t moved a muscle since the start of class. 

She stood stone still as Skywalker examined her with a frown. “I’m afraid I’m going to have to ask you to withdraw from this course.”

Rey’s heart dropped. His statement was enough to make Ben raise his head. She swallowed the tears that threatened to break from behind her eyes.

She nodded rigidly. “I…understand.”

Skywalker looked back and forth between his nephew and her. “This is a very serious matter. If the Dean were to find out…” he paused. His eyes glided to Ben. “I’m very disappointed in you, Ben. Taking advantage of this young girl like that, especially with the academic power you’ve been given.”

Ben was silent. His eyes were locked on the floor.

“It wasn’t just him,” Rey said, her voice becoming firmer. “I was just as responsible. It was completely consensual. Please don’t fire him. I’ll withdraw from the class. I’ll postpone my graduation for another semester if I have to. I know how much Ben needs this job, just…just please don’t fire him because of me.” Her eyes were wet now, but she didn’t care.

Skywalker turned back to Rey. His eyes studied her carefully, and she wished she knew what he was thinking.

“Rey, if you could give my nephew and I some privacy.”

She nodded sadly, wiping at her eyes as she gathered her things and placed her textbook on Skywalker’s desk. She pivoted and walked out of the classroom, the tears freely flowing down her face.

She didn’t hear from Ben for three days. During that time Finn came over to offer emotional support, having been briefed on the situation by Poe. While the feeling of not knowing what her and Ben’s future would hold was terrifying, Rey was thankful she had her best friend by her side.

On the fifth day of silence, Rey finally decided to text him.

**_Ben?_ **

He didn’t respond for hours. The longer his silence lasted the more Rey’s stomach twisted into knots. Just when she thought he was never going to speak to her again, her phone vibrated.

_I’m sorry._

**_Don’t be. This is just as much my fault._ **

_I shouldn’t have pursued you the way I did._

He might as well have stabbed her with a knife. Her thumbs shook as she typed out her next text.

**_Do you regret it then?_ **

He took a few minuets to respond. And then-

_…I don’t know._

_I’ll let you know in a few days._

Rey stared down at her phone, utterly confused. Why did he need a few days to answer her question? What was he playing at? She felt so helpless, so miserable, so _angry._ At Mora, at herself, at Ben. She knew if she didn’t do something she would go insane.

So she sat down, pulled out a pen and paper and wrote.


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> PLEASE READ:
> 
> I know some of you will be disappointed with the rather short length/rushed pacing of this story, but just remember this was never meant to be anything more than just an AU experiment for myself. I personally have way more fun writing Star Wars AU and canon-compliant stories, just because I love the universe and the way Rey and Ben specifically fit into that universe. It’s why I got hooked on Reylo in the first place! 
> 
> If you’re interested in keeping up with my work keep your eyes peeled for “The Writings of Ben Solo” which will be entirely a romance/character-based story following the Last Jedi. (With some AU elements.) It will include illustrations, and I plan to update every day once I start posting. Thanks again for reading!

            It was Monday night when Rey showed up to Ben’s apartment, note in hand. She didn’t plan on seeing him in person-she wasn’t even sure he would want that to begin with-so she crouched outside his apartment door with the intention to slip the note underneath. Her temple had just made contact with the floor when the door opened.

She sprang up immediately, her face bright red, crumpling the note in her hand.

“Ben!” she exclaimed, her voice two notches higher than normal. “I was, uh-”

“Lying outside my doorway?” he asked, a trace amount of amusement in his voice despite the situation. His eyes drifted down to the paper she held. “What’s that?”

She hurriedly hid the note behind her back. “It’s nothing!”

He sighed. “Rey.”

She shuffled her feet before slowly bringing the paper into view again, shame written all over her face. “I just…I figured you wouldn’t want to…to see me anymore.” She swallowed the emotion in her throat. “I understand that. You regret it. I don’t blame you.” She blinked several times before robotically handing him the message. “I thought I’d write this. You know, after everything, you _did_ sort of help me become a better writer.” She winced, subconsciously running her hand over the bun on the back of her head. She took a step backwards. “I should go.”

“Wait,” he said, when she made to leave. “Let me read it first.”

She couldn’t think of anything more humiliating than to linger and gauge his reaction, but she stayed rooted to the spot, a part of her realizing it couldn’t possibly get worse than it already was. He unfolded the paper and scanned her words. He didn’t have to read it out loud. She already knew it by heart.

_Ben,_

_I’ve never really known what to say. I mean, I’ve lived my whole life based on logic. There was never a need for me to stop and put what I was feeling into words. I’ll never be a poet, or a real writer, or any of that. I’m too stubborn to play by their rules, and honestly, I have the most fun when I break them anyway. I know you’ve done your fair share of rule breaking; I certainly haven’t helped with that. You may regret all of it. You may wish you had a second chance so you could go back and change everything. If I could do it over again, I would make some changes too. I wouldn’t waste my time writing about the lonely boy with the big ears in the corner of a stuffy classroom. I would march right up to him and tell him I was lonely too, and that if he ever needed a friend, then I could be that for him. It seems silly, but I’d like to think if I’d done that you would still smile at me. You know, the smile that makes me remember even if I can’t ever find the words, you’ll always know what I’m trying to say._

_Love,_

_Rey_

When he finally looked up again, his eyes were wet. Rey opened her mouth to ask him what was wrong, but she never got the chance, for he stepped forward and pressed her to him. His mouth came over hers, and she stiffened in shock before she gradually leaned into the embrace. When they broke apart he continued to hold her face, and her eyes searched his in confusion.

“But I thought…I thought you regretted this,” she whispered.

“I would have, if I had ruined everything for you,” he said gruffly, his thumb running over her cheek. “I just got off the phone with Skywalker. He agreed to let you finish out the semester, so you can graduate at the end of the summer.”

She blinked in shock. “But…you’re job-”

He smiled bitterly. “It’s just a job. I’ll find another.”

Rey swallowed, still trying to process what he was saying. “How did you get him to change his mind?”

Ben shook his head softly. “I showed him the poem you wrote about me, on that first day. And then I resigned.” He smiled at her. “Skywalker’s many things, but he’s not a _complete_ fool. He can tell that…that you’re what I need to get my life back on track.”

Rey didn’t realize she was crying until he wiped a tear from her face. “Well, I’m glad you finally figured that out for yourself,” she said, half-jokingly.

He rolled his eyes. When she leaned in again, he mirrored her, thinking she was going in for another kiss. Instead, she lifted her hand to gently tug on one of his ears.

Ben laughed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> (See my note above if you haven’t already :) ) Just a sweet little ending. I hope you enjoyed my short, AU experiment. I had a lot of fun with this, but I think it’s time for me to get back to the genres I love and am best at writing the most. Thank you to all my readers for your lovely comments and kudos! Catch you on the flip side. <3


End file.
